After the birth of my second child and being diagnosed with a thyroid hormone issue, I realized the profound impact of stress on my body. Despite a healthy lifestyle, my body was demanding a change. This realization led me to understand the importance of self love in maintaining health. You cannot simply tick boxes to manage stress or improve health; it involves a deep commitment to nurturing self love daily.
The Epiphany of Self Love
It was a turning point to understand that real health stems from genuine self care, not just physical routines. As much as I wanted to continue pushing forward, checking all the appropriate boxes – eating “clean”, working out 5 days a week, rushing to and from my corporate job with 2 kids at home, flying through my weekends from birthday parties to soccer practices to date nights, while trying to fit in grocery shopping, meal prep, parent teacher conference sign ups and halloween costumes, my body was trying to tell me, time and time again –
“This is too much. I’m feeling stressed out. When are you going to hear me. What do I have to do for you to listen?”
I sat with this for a while.
I realized that you can’t reduce stress by flipping a switch or checking a box, as much as us type A people want to do. Yoga and meditation are not boxes to check. Bummer, right?
Spoiler alert – we actually need to not feel stressed in order to heal our health and experience optimal wellbeing.
We need to actually feel zen and happy for our hormones to function optimally, for our metabolism to work most effectively, for us to lose weight, sleep well, alleviate cravings and eat well and so on and so forth.
I realized how mission critical it is for us to be hyper aware of our mind body connection so we can effectively self navigate, allowing us to not only experience inner harmony, but optimal health.
This was a pivotal moment in my healing journey, as it became the push and guidance I needed to really figure out how a busy, working Mama of 2 (now 3), could actually live a stress free life, allowing me to experience the health and wellbeing I deeply desired.
While there are certainly physical and environmental stressors on the body, the most important and impactful ways to alleviate stress on your body, stem from your mind.
The biggest culprit for my inner turmoil and stress, stemmed from my toxic relationship with myself. I was brutal to me.I would never speak to someone the way I spoke to myself. I was so incredibly hard on myself and perpetually set insanely high, unrealistic standards for myself.
My mind was consumed with negative self talk, incessant berating and perpetual frustration with my body, my image, my “failures”, and on and on.
And I wondered why I was stressed!
Learning how to love myself has been an ongoing journey and the most fascinating part, is that as my relationship with myself has strengthened and improved, my stress has drastically reduced in proportion to it.
Our upbringing and childhood experiences, no matter how well intentioned our care takers may be, often shift our relationship with ourselves from loving to protective and fearful. These toxic thought patterns create immense inner turmoil in our bodies that translates into poor health leading to disease.
I am passionate about helping women learn to love themselves so they can feel their best.
Six Ways to Cultivate Self Love Every Day
- Grant yourself Grace – Stop beating yourself up. Instead, give yourself grace for your misstep and give yourself credit and praise for trying.
- Drop the “shoulds” – If the thing in question is a “should”, you shouldn’t be doing it. If you’re perceiving it as a should, it’s not something that feels in alignment with you. Ask yourself if the outcome of doing the thing is something that will bring you joy or is alignment with a goal that will bring you joy and if so, reframe and remind yourself that you’re making the choice because the outcome will bring you joy. Taking the action will then feel more harmonious to you and not bear stress. If, on the other hand, the thing is not in alignment with something that brings you joy or a goal that will bring you joy, than say “no” and move on, without guilt.
- Affirmations in the Mirror – Look yourself dead in the mirror and tell yourself “I love you”. Take in all of the details of your face and your beauty. Fall in love with yourself and let those vibrations run throughout your body. If you don’t have a strong relationship with yourself, it will feel very weird and uncomfortable. That is a sign that you need to keep doing it. Keep at it and you will see how it becomes less and less uncomfortable and one day, you will actually feel it.
- Practice Gratitude for Your Body – When you take a shower or put lotion on, rub each part of your body with soap or lotion and thank it for the work it does for you every day. Thank your legs for carrying you around all day and your heart for pumping blood to your body and beating all day. Feel gratitude for each and every part of your body and really let that gratitude run all over your body.
- Declare Your Positive Traits – Declare 3 things you love about yourself and write them down. If you have to put them on a post it next to your mirror to remind you each day, do that.
- Celebrate Your Wins – Celebrate your wins daily. Cheer yourself on and give yourself high fives in the same way you would your daughter or bestie.
Keep doing these and you’ll be amazed with how it changes your relationship with yourself.
xx
Misha
