We’ve been programmed through marketing to make external changes to ourselves to help us feel better and look good and now even more so than before. Don’t like how you look, dye your hair, get extensions, fake eyelashes, get your nails done, get your eyebrows micro-bladed, get new clothes, get a facial, and the list goes on and on. Yet, while we chase these external solutions, we often overlook the most powerful transformation available to us: inner work.
If we just get that last thing done, get that last appointment, see that one stylist, that one doctor, trainer, healer, that one person, we’ll feel better.
We believe that the answers are outside ourselves because honestly, it’s way easier to spin our wheels seeking answers and results from external sources than to stop and go inward for them.
The Inner Work
It’s can be hard to tune in for 30 seconds, let alone 10 minutes. We avoid listening to our inner most thoughts because it can get scary and crazy in there! It’s hard as it requires tapping into stillness, which can result in discomfort in this stimulating, modern world we live in.
Listen, I’m actually really excited about getting my brows micro-bladed and couldn’t be more anal about my hair, but the issue is that if you’re only doing the external work, you’re chasing your tail.
The inner work that helps you connect and heal your inner child, that helps you connect with your deepest hopes and desires, helps you push through those limiting beliefs and excavate the most authentic, bad ass and fabulous version of you, is what is going to bring you the most stunning beauty, health and happiness.
I know, I know, it sounds like a load of hog wash, and you’re wondering how healing your inner child has any association with your hair and health.
I’m going to break it down for you, and I can tell you first hand as someone who’s health, beauty (inner and outer) and happiness came to a screeching halt due to my lack of self love and massive inner turmoil associated to my relationship with myself.
Hitting my Breaking Point
Aside from always being on the go, constantly pushing myself more, pleasing others more, doing more, I also beat myself up so much, was such an intensely harsh critic to myself, so wretchedly mean and gave myself such unrealistic goals, that at some point, my body completely said, I can’t take it anymore and showed me what’s up the hard way.
Have you ever heard the quote from Oprah about how the universe is whispering to us all the time? It’s basically what happened to me. Here’s the abridged version:
“It whispers, and if you don’t get the whisper, the whisper gets louder. If you don’t get the whisper when it gets louder, I call it like a little pebble — a little thump — upside the head… The pebble or the thump upside the head usually [means] it’s gone into a problem.
If you don’t pay attention to the problem, the pebble then becomes like a brick. The brick upside your head is a crisis. “[If] you don’t pay attention to the brick upside your head, the crisis turns into a disaster and the whole house — brick wall — comes falling down.” Oprah Winfrey
It was crippling, emotionally and physically painful.
Despite the fact that I always kept a healthy diet and fitness regimen, my inner turmoil was so great, that it resulted on way too much stress on my body, which then impacted my health, metabolism and body shut the fuck down. The whole house came falling down.
I wouldn’t have believed it either, until it actually happened.
I ended up being unable to walk, or even so much as type without being in excruciating pain due to immense inflammation in my body, that stemmed from leaky gut.
My brain shut down due to my cholesterol being too low, thus there not being enough healthy fat to fuel my brain.
I had weight gain, mood swings, anxiety, insomnia, depression, rectal bleeding, yeast infections, miscarriages, dandruff, extreme sensitivity to light and sounds, night sweats, nail fungus, brittle hair, extreme lethargy, illness after every meal and on and on. If you think this is bad, you’re not even seeing the half of it.
If you want to learn more about the science of how stress impacts your health, watch my video here.
My Healing Journey
Through my journey, I tried it all, in conjunction with my incredible functional doctor, Dr Jeffrey Morrison, who I credit my transformative healing to.
While diet, herbs and supplements were very instrumental in the healing process, the most radical and dramatic healing shifts only came when I softened up and began to heal the relationship with myself thereby drastically reducing my stress.
I will never forget my health coach literally prescribing me daily meditation, journaling and telling me that I was not allowed to work out for 6 weeks. My fitness obsessed self could not fathom how not working out would help me lose the excess weight.
Until it literally just fell off, the calmer my nervous system got. The more I tuned in, got quiet, journaled, meditated, worked with a therapist, practiced self love, enhanced my sleep hygiene, I continued to see massive improvements in my appearance and health.
The working out was also just another stressor on my already stressed system and was backfiring. My body needed gentle and calming nourishment, self care and self love.
Going Inward
As I would get quiet, I would be able to connect with that spirit within that we all have that wants to be heard. Just like a friend or a partner, the more we make the effort to listen to what it has to say, the more it wants to share and the louder the voice gets. It goes from a meek, soft, sporadic voice that is used to being stifled to a more consistent, positive, upbeat voice that is pumped to be able to share her new ideas, wishes, revelations and beliefs.
The quiet time gives us much needed spaciousness in our minds, a spiritual cleanse, releasing excess and burdensome weight from carrying around unnecessary thoughts running from our subconscious mind and most importantly, it gives us the ability to bond and check in with ourselves.
Building the relationship with ourselves
These check ins are so valuable as we’re able to spend time with ourselves and get familiar with how on or off track we our from our purpose and the fulfilling life we wish to live. It gives us the ability to try to get clear on what our purpose is and if we’re showing up in this world in the ways we want to every day.
Are we living in alignment with the life we imagined? Is there more that we wish we were doing? How can we make those opportunities available to ourselves? Are we in a job we feel is in alignment with our morals and values? Are there people we’ve been meaning to check in on? Are there places we would like to plan to go? How do we feel today? How are we feeling in the relationships in our lives? How are we feeling about our finances? How can we support ourselves?
These are critical questions that we must feel comfortable spending time with and dissecting. Some of these questions are those you would likely be asking a good friend when you have a catch up. Have you asked yourself?
If there is resistance or blockages, you should spend time there. Instead of shying away, ask yourself what you’re resisting? What is this triggering? What sensations are you feeling in your body? What about this topic feels uncomfortable?
As you probe, you’ll be able to excavate, cleanse and clear these emotional blockages and unearth deeper messages, supporting you that emotional healing you need to alleviate stress and support your health.
Once we start to tap into that inner knowing, that’s when the confidence, drive, passion and power takes over. As we strengthen our inner alignment, inner peace and harmony follow, releasing stress and giving us that magnetic, vibrant beauty and energy we all desire. It’s literally, like magic.
The results
In my case, my eyes were brighter than ever, my skin was healthier and shinier, my nails were strong and bright, my muscles and joints were strong and painless, my body was shed all it’s weight and was lean, my brain and memory were sharp, a my energy was bountiful and upbeat, and all of my 67 (that is the actual number!) of ailments were gone.
Mind you, all of this radical healing took place in 6 weeks from my complete health breakdown, which had zero fitness involved, but a clean diet and prescribed mindfulness, journaling, rest and self love support.
You can certainly continue with all the cosmetic appointments and retail therapy, but that will only get you so far.
Guys, you don’t want the whisper to become a brick. Start to tune in to your mind and body now. Listen and treat yourself as you would your own best friend.
Now go grab that journal and get flowing so you can run after your kids filled with energy and joy!
Sending you hugs today.
xx
